She Wants It

What do you do, when your second album's sales dwarf in comparison to your debut's, and you're about to release your third album in a highly volatile music industry? You get golden child Justin Timberlake, and huggable producer, Timbaland to help you produce a track that throws street cred to the wind! WEEE! This is exactly what 50 (pronounced Fiddy) Cent has done, and wow are the ladies swoonin (please see picture). "Girl, he can bust a cap in my ass any day", the ladies have been heard to scream, and with good reason. "She Wants It", which was going to be titled "Ayo Pornography" is the summer smash guaranteed to get drawers in a bunch. It is essentially about getting ...err....frustrated when watching porno. You can't say 50 isn't pushing limits. He has taken us out of the club, and onto the couch, where we can imagine him, JT and Timbaland all getting frustrated together. YAY for male bonding! Perez Hilton's page has the mp3 embed, and since I cant snag it from there, just mosey on over to check it out.


So like Justin says in the song, "I'm tired of technology", so, later!

Shock Value

Timbaland dolin out beat downs? I know he wanted to kick up his rep, but beating up people in Germany is a tad intense. TMZ.Com via Pitchfork reported that after a Justin Timberlake show in Cologne, Germany, Timba got all durrty south on some dude's ass and sent him packing...to the hospital. Good For him! I think this is a far better approach to looking tough than putting out a crappy album.

Bounce Like You Ass Got Hickups

Timabland's Shock Value is now leaking out to all those with a thimble full worth of internets savvy. I seldom attempt to review albums, mostly because I'm just no good at it, but I feel that this album may prove to be my muse.
Frankly, I'm torn. Timbaland is the king of beat making, there is no doubt, and this release is clearly a testament to his musical genius. Unfortunately, I feel the major shock is derived from Timba's choice in lyrical marinade. His heart jostling drums are smothered in a heavy, stomach turning layer of cliche "I'ma busta cap in your dome" pontificating, which hurts the value of Value. Timba is not a persona that strikes fear into the heart of all who dwell either on street corner, or plush suburb, and his background is not exactly riddled with nefarious activity. Plus...the album has Fall Out Boy on it, a fact which, significantly decreases your street cred, believe me. Even if one over looks the collaborators, which they should, and listen purely to Mosely, you can almost feel his angst and discomfort with what he is saying. He sounds almost forlorn, estranged from the good times and goofy antics he has become associated with, to pursue acceptance in the realm of mainstream artists that he has produced to the top, but has never been categorized with. Luckily, this is only if you listen to the "gangstafied tracks."
If you look past these few, yet noticeable foibles, what is left is a chewy center of goof. Not like, chopped up disney characters, because thats just gross, but tracks clearly dedicated to being pure dumbness from the jump. In "Way I Are" Timbaland captures my heart, and the hearts of any man who wants to wine and dine the ladies, but is struggling to "red bean and rice" himself. With lines like:

"I ain't got no money, I ain't got no car to take you on a date
I can't even buy you flowers, but together we'd make the perfect soul mates"

Timbaland detracts from the attempted hood seriousness of other tracks, which helps to save face. Its a shame that this isn't the element that was chosen to market, and instead singles are released to start beef with a less than worthy opponent, Scott Storch. This being the case, I'm going to create a list of key lines to win the public, and help Tim gain his 50x platinum status. I just want things to work out for him. If interested in tackling the tracks on your own, "Bounce", "One and Only", and "Way I Are" are good places to start. If not, any one of the songs on this album will undoubtedly hit a club scene near you.The Album drops April 3rd.

Expect the list of awesome lines sometime this weekend. Just note a lot of them make fun of Ms. Spears (Thanks JT).

Timbaland Myspace

When She Called My Sneakers Tennis Shoes, I Knew She Was From The West Coast

Yesterday was pretty exhausting. I was en route to CA for the better part of the day( thanks to Ja-Lisa), and was privileged to sit in front of two children who enjoyed pulling my hair while I attempted to sleep. Aside from that, and lack of free wireless interweb in NC, alls good.

For those who are interested in Justin Timberlake, his tour seems to be going quite well. A point of interests is that Timbaland will be doing his own promotional set to get anyone within ear shot hype for his new album Shock Value, which should be out later this year. The album is basically a tribute to Timb's beat skillz and is dedicated toward the progress of "gloabl" music, from Timba's perspective...whatever that means. Their is an article in GQ that provides insight to Walter Mosely's genius, which I read on the plane. Check it out, along with other males fashion insight. It also provides a hint to Justin's new album, which they are working on while on tour.

While I'm out here, I'm going to try and take a look into finding some sneaker inspiration. I want to do something different, and since all I do is gripe about shoes, I feel its time to take some progressive action. Wish me luck, as I peruse the land of slide vans and laced chucks.